Stop the madness!!

Since I've become a mom three years ago, I've noticed some things that make me want to pull my hair out and scream at the top of my lungs STOP THE MADNESS! Although there a several things that will spark this kind of teeth gritting behavior in me it all boils down to one thing. JUDGMENT.

What do I mean by that, you may ask? Let me explain.

I recently had a lively conversation, and by lively I mean an argument, with a family member who thought it was ridiculous that I let my boys sleep and nap schedule determine how we run our day. They felt that we shouldn't let their schedule run our lives and that we are the adults so we should say when and where things take place. Um, Have you seen a tired three year old lately?! Do you know how a one year old acts when they are ready for bed when you are out running errands?! It's not a pretty picture. I admit, I have always been a nap Nazi but I've found that this can be a good thing to my family's well being and those around me. Besides being completely taken aback and offended, what I really couldn't believe was that they were trying to judge me on how I parent my children.

And it doesn't just stop there with family; I was out and about with my three year old one day and told him if he behaved in the store he could pick out a pack of gum when we were checking out. I'm not above using bribery to get things done. I don't do it all the time, but I do use it as one of my many parental arsenals to get things done. As I finished up my hour long grocery trip and was waiting in the checkout line, I told my son to pick out his gum for being so good (as a side note any mom with a toddler will testify that shopping for an hour with their toddler without a break down is almost a miracle). When the lady behind me felt the need to speak up and told me I was setting my son up for bad behavior down the road and that it should be expected that he behave while out in public. Excuse me? Who are you? I didn't know I was standing in the judgment lane.

I could go on and on with things I've heard and witnessed, but honestly I don't have the time and neither do you. My point is what happened to the parental camaraderie? To the idea of supporting and lifting each other up because WE HAVE ALL BEEN THERE. Who am I to tell another person the best way to parent their child? And what happened to the notion that every child is unique with different likes, dislikes, and hot buttons?

For some reason I had this grand idea in my head that once I became a mom that I would be part of this exclusive parenting club where we all helped each other out, celebrated milestones and achievements, and above all else supported one another. Maybe I'm the naive one to want and thrive for this type of support? I'll admit that before I became a mom I would judge other parents and make those stupid false promises that my kid would never act this way or that, but that was before I knew the reality of what being a parent entailed. And believe me some of those stupid promises I made have come back to bite me in the butt, especially the one about not having a picky eater. Boy was I the foolish one!

The reason for this post was not to get on a soap box (even though I know I have), but to urge everyone to support the parents around you. If you see a parent using bribery tricks to get their kids to behave, applaud them because it's really for you to have a better experience when out and about, not them. If your friend shows up late to a get together because her kids were finishing up a nap, pat her on the back instead of being annoyed she wasn't there on time. Believe me your visit with them will go so much better. Most of all lift up your fellow parents and know they are trying to be the best parent they can be to the kids God gave to them. I'm telling you, it will feel amazing!